News reports claim snipers attempted a domestic terrorist attack on the power grid, but I have to doubt this claim. You see, I think I know my fellow Americans, and here’s what I think happened:
Some drunk guy at a bar said: “Man, I could shoot a power line off a pole!” And someone else drinking at the bar heard him and said: “No way, man!” And the guy said: “I could too!” And the other guy said: “I bet I could do it better than you!” And then a third drunk guy said: “Prove it!” And then they both said: “Okay!” And then they went and shot at electrical wires at a power station. And then, when they actually hit and knocked down some power cables, they finally realized what they were really doing, and they understood the gravity of the situation, and they ran away.
I’d be willing to bet that’s what really happened. (But lucky for me, I’m not a gambling man.)
(I went to a boarding school, and a guy I knew, after curfew, said he had an air rifle, and that he could hit the window right in front of the security guy, and enough people said: “No way!”, and so he did it. This is how I know this scenario so well. And we weren’t even drinking! {By the way, he got away with it somehow: unbelievably, they never found the pellet gun! If it were alcohol, it would have been ferreted out for sure! My school instituted a “zero tolerance” policy for alcohol, and the very first student to be caught and expelled was the headmaster’s daughter: no joke. That’s how dumb zero tolerance policies are!})
