Anyone who has ever been bored enough to watch that History Channel show Ancient Aliens knows that there is some guy on it always spouting ancient astronaut stuff and alien conspiracy crap who has the most ridiculous hair imaginable short of dyeing and artificially styling or cutting it. It seriously looks like his whole head is covered in cowlicks and he’s accentuating them all to stand up as much as possible with a whole bucketful of hair gel. But I’ll bet it’s just like that naturally, which seems extremely unnatural to me. His name is Giorgio A. Tsoukalos: He publishes a magazine called Legendary Times, and he’s always yammering on about all this silly stuff that sounds ridiculous; but when I look at his hair, something occurs to me. Sure, what he says about aliens sounds perhaps fanciful and unbelievable, but his hair could only have been made that way with alien technology!
I’ll bet what happened is this: The aliens are here, and they have been here all along, exploiting us or laughing at us or whatever; and one day, when they were really bored, they were watching the History Channel and saw Ancient Aliens, and they realized that this guy was onto them and was revealing all of their secrets! So what they did must have been this: They abducted Mr. Tsoukalos, and then they did something ridiculous to his hair so it would always look so weird and silly, nobody would ever believe him about anything. Then they simply warped him back through time to the beginning of the show, and then they just let him do whatever he was going to do, but with such a dumb-looking hairstyle, nobody would take him seriously. And through this technique, the aliens remain undetected by most of humanity to this very day, despite the fact that Mr. Tsoukalos has been onto them the whole time and has been telling the truth all along!
What do you think? Does it sound plausible?
Here’s a picture of the hair guy:
