With Tea Party Congressmen unwilling to budge on tax, revenue and spending issues in the debt ceiling bills, people on the news are saying over and over again how “compromise is a dirty word” now. Well, that’s a relief! I was beginning to think I was some kind of weirdo pervert, since the idea of compromise always makes me hot & bothered. But if it’s a dirty word, then, hey: it all makes sense! And so people can get each other turned on talking about compromise from now on! In fact, that’s probably why they’re not willing to talk compromise in the House of Representatives: it’s controlled by the conservative Republicans, and they’re always super-prudish about sex stuff.
So obviously, this has nothing to do with the debt ceiling or spending cuts: They just don’t want everyone to see them get a boner in Congress! But I don’t see why not. After all, in addition to the fact that there are so many sex-scandals coming out of there all the time, the very word “Congress” actually means sexual intercourse! (<Its fourth definition, according to the dictionary in my computer.) So of course they should have erections! That's why they're called: "Members of Congress"!
Oh, but perhaps this is actually the real problem! For you see, when they talk about compromise, they probably realize that everyone will be expecting them to have raging hard-ons, but they must not be able to get any because they’re impotent! So that’s why they need to get and take lots of free Viagra and Cialis from their health plan! Then, once they’ve taken it, they’ll be able to “get it up”, and then they can get on with it, raising the debt ceiling.
In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if they’ve been thinking this whole time that they’re going to be expected to raise the debt ceiling with their erections, and that’s why they don’t want to do it! But if they take those pills, they won’t be able to help it! So that’s why we should all send Viagra to our Congressmen today! After all, the financial future of our country depends upon it! They must get it up to get it on!
