Some guy was on NPR today saying that the “Head Start” program, where the government helps assist underprivileged pre-schoolers, is a failure, and that we should cancel it. He pointed to a study where it was suggested the data showed the effects were minimal, and disappeared after first-grade. Yeah, I know what’s up with this guy: He just hates kids! Or maybe even worse, some smart kid from the Head Start program probably showed him up as an idiot when the kid proved him wrong about something in front of everyone! I’ll bet that’s what really happened! And so to get revenge, he’s trying to stop “Head Start”.
You know, come to think of it, there are plenty of other reasons why this guy might be trying to get revenge on children by killing the Head Start program. Maybe when he was 3-years-old, some 4- and 5-year-olds beat him up every day, and ever since then, he’s been trying to get revenge on 4- and 5-year-olds! Also, it’s possible that some underprivileged kid beat him out for getting into the very college he wanted to go to more than anything else in the whole world! So all poor kids must pay for his vengeance to be complete! And that’s why he wants to get Head Start canceled.
I knew it! So it is true! That jerk! He could have gone to any other college he wanted to, but no: it had to be that one! And so now he blames all poor people, and he’s trying to destroy them all! How could he? Is he heartless? How did his head start filling up with all this rage and hate? Can’t he just count to ten, and realize revenge isn’t the answer?
But no: Now it’s too late! He’s already committed to trying to kill the program on NPR: the station everyone always listens to, so everyone will know he’s already done it! If he tries to back-out now, he’ll look like a fool! No, better to destroy the dreams of children everywhere than that! Surely you must see that, right?
