That’s right: The News of the World, the only newspaper ever honored with a song by The Jam about it, is printing its last edition Sunday. This comes as a result of some phone-hacking scandal, which revealed the unsavory nature of their data collection methods.
Well, good-bye muckrakers! And some will say: “Good riddance!” But is this really a good thing for us after all?
Without muckrakers to rake up all the muck, won’t we be left to drown in a flood of uncontrolled muck? Perhaps we would all have drowned years ago in a swamp of festering muck had not heroes like the criminally-behaved reporters for the “News of the World” newspaper saved us all from a fate worse than death, as well as providing us with such sensationalistic and salaciously entertaining stories about the contents of celebrity voice-mails and such.
So, in the near future, when we’re all drowning due to the inundation of the slimy tabloid muck flood, remember: these guys were saving you from it all, and creating jobs in the process, but you had to go and stab them in the back!
Now I have to wonder: will they simply open a new sensationalistic tabloid paper with a new name at the same location? I would! After all, where else could you possibly find so many out-of-work muckraking journalists in one place, with newspaper presses and everything already pre-installed? It’s perfect! Just call it: “The Daily Gossip Muckraker”. That way, nobody could ever accuse you of being a muckraking gossip rag thinly disguised as a respectable newspaper. Right?
