It looks like the Fast and the Furious franchise is coming to a close, but we can't just let this kind of reckless endangerment film just up and disappear. But trying to capture lightning in a bottle more than, um, seven times is just unreasonable. And that's why I think we need a rethink of this genre.
Yes, interesting people from disparate, desperate backgrounds winding up owning priceless cars and wearing the absolute apogee of couture fashion while constantly throwing caution to the wind to race through crowded city streets and always giving multiple police vehicles in pursuit the slip seems a touch whimsical and unrealistic to me. Oh, but empty-headed rich poseurs getting their parents to buy such things for them so they can go show off seems pretty much right on target; and naturally, from all the reality shows we see of these Beverly Hills rich kids, they're all going to look like catalog models, and so how about a new movie series with this type of group?
Yes, it's The Rapid and the Vapid, the movie series showcasing spoiled rich brats and their ridiculously cool cars and awesome, expensive clothes. Oh, but being spoiled poseurs, they don't know how to drive for sh!t, and so when they try to race and such, they always wreck and stuff. But who cares, since they're such jerks? Oh, but as we all know, the rich kids acting irresponsibly never get harmed themselves; they only harm and kill others, and then they get away with it through family connections or high-priced lawyers or at the very least a diagnosis of affluenza, and so they always get another car and go back to drinking whatever top-shelf liquor and racing in a new super car. But despite their connections and money and material wealth beyond most people's dreams, they're still empty-headed spoiled vapid punks who couldn't converse their way out of a paper bag.
That's The Rapid and the Vapid: Coming soon to a theater near you!
(Who knows, maybe if the next street racing movie features a group of jerky characters, kids won't want to emulate them, and there will be less dangerous driving in the future.)
