I keep hearing military and intelligence analysts saying that the War on Terror is not over, that there will always be a threat, etc. It looks to me like the War on Terror is an everlasting, unwinnable war like the War on Drugs. Maybe we went after too difficult of an opponent. Now, I don’t mean the terrorist threat, I mean terror. After all, it’s called the “War on Terror”, not the “War on Terrorism”. And if it’s really the “War on Terror”, doesn’t that mean we’re going to have to fight guys like Freddy Krueger in our dreams and stuff? I don’t know about doing that: that’s terrifying.
So maybe we bit off more than we could chew with the War on Terror, perhaps we should make it a little easier on ourselves and just declare a war on scary instead. We could bomb bats and spiders and blow up old haunted cemeteries and stuff. And we could destroy closet monsters by setting up an automatic light that turns on after the closet door is closed (like the opposite of what a refrigerator light does). Then we could make Halloween illegal unless all the kids agree to dress up as good-guy superheroes and hero movie characters. Oh, they’re already doing that anyway, huh? Well, then we’re already halfway there to winning the war on scary!
