We all know Lady Gaga ruined the celebration of the resurrection of Christ on purpose and intentionally insulted all of Christianity when she released her song “Judas” on Easter earlier this year. We also know this song pretends to use Judas as a metaphor for the “bad boy” type of guy, when it’s actually secretly trying to make Jesus mad. Well, once wasn’t enough for Ms. Gaga; she had to defile Easter again with her filth last night! What? It wasn’t Easter again yesterday? Oh. Sorry, I thought it was because she performed “Judas”. But you know what? It was Judgment Day yesterday, and that’s even worse!
That’s right! While everyone is sitting around all smug and self-satisfied that the world didn’t end yesterday like it was supposed to, nobody is recognizing or admitting the truth: Lady Gaga’s performance of “Judas” last night on Saturday Night Live ruined Judgment Day and now nobody’s going to get Raptured!
Okay, here’s what happened: As some of you know, I was Raptured yesterday evening by mistake (see my post: “Back from the Dead”). I wasn’t sure why They could make a mistake so easily, but it’s clear now! Obviously Jesus knew about Lady Gaga’s plans to sing “Judas” on the occasion of the Rapture, and it so incensed and distracted Him that it threw Him off His game! He was naturally so upset with humanity over this, He gave out the wrong names and stuff by accident, and the angels collected all the wrong people. Then, when He realized the mistake, He was in the process of correcting it when Lady Gaga actually began performing “Judas”, and He got so mad that He decided to call it off completely and not save anyone after all. And it’s all her fault! She knew this would destroy mankind’s only chance at salvation, but she did it anyway! Well, I hope you’re happy now, Lady Gaga, because now everyone’s going to have to burn in hell because of you!
But Jesus had His revenge! If you saw SNL last night on the West Coast, you know that there was a screw-up with the ad break preceding the performance of Lady Gaga's second song ("Born This Way"), with a few lengthy instances of “dead air” and ads cutting off halfway through, etc. When they finally came back to the show, the song was halfway over already! I’ve never seen that happen before on SNL, especially with a big star like Lady Gaga performing. So obviously Jesus did that to get her back for screwing up Judgment Day.
