Thursday, August 23, 2012

Prince Harry Ruins Vegas Ad Campaign

Hey, we all bought into it, right? What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas! And that means you can live out your most immoral, criminally perverted fantasy without fear of discovery or prosecution if only you do it in Las Vegas; at least, that was the marketing claim. And I’m sure most of us have gone there and done unspeakable acts, expecting that neither hide nor hair of our debased, degenerate debauchery would ever rear its ugly head into the carefully constructed charade of normality we disingenuously and derisively call our everyday lives.

Oh, but thanks to Prince Harry blowing the whistle on this little enterprise Vegas apparently (allegedly) has been running, everyone is going to realize now that their every move has been documented (allegedly!) by hidden cameras, and it’s only a matter of time before they’re blackmailed or publicly exposed to their spouses and employers (allegedly!). And now that we all know about it, hardly anyone will go to Las Vegas to live out their sick, twisted, disgustingly depraved lunatic shenanigans any longer (unless some of them actually enjoy the masochism of such humiliation: for these individuals will be pleasantly surprised and rewarded beyond their wildest dreams! {Allegedly.}), and Vegas will lose all their business to Atlantic City from now on. (Just think of it: Won’t the magic of living out one’s wildest corrupt fantasies lose its luster if they must be performed in New Jersey? When one does stuff like that there, it just makes it seem commonplace, doesn’t it?)

So thanks, Prince Harry, for ruining it for everyone! You pampered Royals think you can just do anything you want, don’t you? Even ruining a great ad campaign isn’t beneath you apparently! Oh, for shame! A lot of ad people spent a lot of time tricking everyone into coming to Vegas to lose all their money and behave like reprobates with that ad campaign, and now it was all for nothing! Happy now? I mean, sure; you get to debase yourself with excesses and scandalous behavior all the time wherever you want to, but for most people, there’s only one place where we thought we could do it, and now that hope is gone forever. And I think that’s just sad.

Here’s the salacious story:


And here’s a commercial from this crafty campaign, tricking us into thinking we can get away with anything in Las Vegas:


(P.S.: This is just as joke. Vegas does not conspire to photograph and blackmail its visitors. It only conspires to get them all liquored-up and trick them into losing all their money gambling.)