In order to promote the “only moral method of contraception”,
the Republican convention will showcase the talents of the singing group The
Rhythm Method Kids, a singing group made up of thousands of unplanned and
unwanted children born through the use of the unreliable “rhythm method” family
planning method. It is called a “family planning” method, rather than a
contraceptive method, because if you use it, you can plan on having a really big family. The singing group is so big, in
fact, that delegates will be required to exit the convention center and watch
the group perform from outside on large closed-circuit TV screens set up in the
parking lot. When it was pointed out how large the singing group is, and how it
got that way through the use of the “rhythm method”, Republicans countered: “Hey,
at least we have a singing group of unplanned and
unwanted children. You will notice the Democrats don’t even have a singing
group of unplanned children because they use condoms and birth-control pills.
Well, they’re missing out!”
