Monday, April 1, 2013

Judas’s Carry-Out

We’ve all heard of Judas Iscariot. But did you know his last name was wrong? As it turns out, it was misunderstood from the beginning. The fact is, Judas owned a take-out restaurant called: “Judas’s Carry-Out”. And the people who wrote about him just misheard it. It’s an easy mistake to make, so no harm no foul. But when was the last time you heard of someone named Iscariot? I rest my case.

Oh, but not so fast, because I hear Judas had the best take-out kreplach and rugelach in Jerusalem! And so he was known far and wide for his culinary genius. So the Biblical authors should have known him well. (Maybe he screwed up someone’s order, and this is their revenge: he’s a traitor for eternity.)

But now that we know, wouldn’t Judas's Carry-Out be the perfect heartburn ad fodder? Because the ad could claim that Judas's Carry-Out will betray your stomach every time, so you need their antacid to redeem you.

(Okay, you caught me: April Fools.)